August 22, 2016

This is another in a series of responses to my conservative relative’s forwarded emails. If you’re interested, you can read more about how this all started.

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Received Jun 29, 2016 at 11:43 AM:

I didn’t write ANY of the comments.  I’m just passing it on- that’s all.

Begin forwarded message:

——– Original Message ——–

Only in America

Folks, The insanity marches on. You know why I scream at the TV? This is why: We don’t want to insult a hajib clad Muslim woman by a search, but it’s OK to search a nun.

Yep, makes sense to me! You cannot make this stuff up!

Please pass this all around the USA!

Airport security (Detroit Metro Concourse A)… A Catholic nun being frisked by a Muslim security agent!

Excuse me? Did you say a MUSLIM security agent — in the USA – screening for suspected terrorists?
ONLY IN OBAMA’S AMERICA!!

 

My response:

It’s taken me a little while to respond to this, because I wasn’t sure how to do so without offending you. I hope my comments below don’t. However, this one’s important, and I needed to let you know what I thought about it.

Here’s the thing: this email that you forwarded is racist.

I don’t think that you are a racist, but you’ve shared something that is.

I get why conservatives look at this picture and think it’s funny, but do this for me: try to explain why the joke is funny. I don’t think you can without saying something like: “it’s funny because there’s an old white nun who’s being searched by a Muslim woman. Which is nuts, because it’s like the terrorist is searching the person who’s clearly harmless!”

So, all Muslims are terrorists, even the ones who are US citizens, who might even have been born and grew up here; can read, write, and speak English; went through a federal background check; took both physical and drug tests; and completed 100 hours of classroom and on-the-job training (http://work.chron.com/long-hiring-process-tsa-job-28779.html)? (All for a job, incidentally, with a starting salary of $25k)

I think you knew that this one was over the line, because of how you introduced it: “I didn’t write ANY of the comments.  I’m just passing it on- that’s all.” The thing is, that doesn’t absolve you. By passing this on, you’re endorsing it. You’re saying that you agree with it, the statements are okay with you, and that you want to share them with everyone.

I know you have concerns about immigration, refugees, and how well the US is screening people who are coming here. But do you really think that any Muslim is incapable of living here, assimilating into our culture while still following their faith, and working in a security (or any other) job? I don’t believe that’s how you truly feel.

Ultimately, how is this picture any different from a Jewish TSA agent who’s wearing a kippah and tzitzit while at work?

Also, just to speak to the big lie in this email. It says that “we don’t want to insult a hajib clad Muslim woman by a search”. That’s just untrue (http://talkingpointsmemo.com/muckraker/is-tsa-exempting-women-in-hijabs-from-controversial-pat-downs). First off, it’s called a hijab. And secondly, everyone is searched by TSA. Most people go through the full body scanners these days, but you’re allowed to ask for a pat down instead. According to the TSA’s web site (https://www.tsa.gov/travel/frequently-asked-questions):

May I keep head coverings and other religious, cultural or ceremonial items on during screening?

Persons wearing head coverings, loose fitting or bulky garments may undergo additional security screening, which may include a pat-down. A pat-down will be conducted by a TSA officer of the same gender. If an alarm cannot be resolved through a pat-down, you may ask to remove the head covering in a private screening area.

So, Muslim women wearing hijabs who experience a pat-down might be asked to remove them in private. Sounds reasonable. In fact, what you’re seeing in this picture is a direct result of that same policy. I mean, don’t you think it’s OUTRAGEOUS that that nun doesn’t have to take off her habit? No…? Why not?

 

August 5, 2016

This is another in a series of responses to my conservative relative’s forwarded emails. If you’re interested, you can read more about how this all started.

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Received Jul 14, 2016 at 7:37 AM, in 24 point font:

American Co. Eliminates Labor Day

American Co. Eliminates Labor Day to show support for their 700 Muslim employees…working in Tennessee.

THANKS! SO glad they have their name on all of their products. That will make it much easier to eliminate picking up one of their products by mistake. The takeover continues, slowly but surely. Tyson Foods eliminates Labor Day in favor of a Muslim Holiday.

How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. How do you take over America ? One American at a time. Tyson chicken anyone? We all need to heed this message.

Tyson Food in Shelbyville, Tennessee has eliminated Labor Day as a paid holiday in favor of the last day of Ramadan because they have 700 Muslim employees. Tennessee is the newest Hot-Bed for Muslim immigration. According to the 2010 Government Census more Muslims are flocking to Tennessee than any other state in the union.

I will no longer purchase any Tyson products. It’s just one more little chunk of America that’s been bitten off. If you wish to join me, then let your e-mail friends know this. If we don’t stand up for something we will fall for anything. All it takes for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing.

*And the best way to send them the message that they made the wrong decision is to not buy Tyson chicken products!*

Ahlahu Akbar, my ***!

This was verified:
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0%2c2933%2c397645%2c00.html

 

My response:

Not true

http://www.snopes.com/politics/religion/tyson.asp

 

Her response:

So what I read was…. IT WAS true, but they thought better of it and changed their minds due to the stir it caused.
I don’t like that it WAS true for even ten seconds!!!!!!!!!!
What happens when we’re outnumbered?????
It won’t be us- not you or me- It will be [my son] and [my nephew] and [my nephew] and [my nephew].

 

My response:

Sorry… nope. I completely disagree.

First off, let’s recognize that this is a story from 2008 – eight years ago! It’s not like this is some recent issue that has ANYTHING to do with (overblown) fears about ISIS, refugees from Syria, etc.

Second, based on the facts of the story, there was one particular plant in Shelbyville, Tennessee. About 25% of their unionized plant workers (250 of 1,000) were Somali refugee immigrants who are Muslim. The union, in their contract negotiations, requested that their employees get Eid Al Fitr off instead of Labor Day. That contract was agreed upon and was voted in by over 80% (800+ people) of their union members at the plant.

Ultimately this was changed, probably largely due to the story getting picked up nationally and the (in my opinion, unnecessary and ridiculous) outrage it inspired, so that the employees could either take off Eid or their birthday.

In 2008, when this came up, Eid was being celebrated at the beginning of October, so it was still an early Fall holiday. A swap with Labor Day seems pretty logical, timing-wise.

So, a union at a particular plant had a large enough Muslim membership that they asked for one of their holiest holidays off, it was agreed upon by all parties, and ratified by the union membership. What’s wrong with that?

Third, let’s examine what happens during the celebration of Eid (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eid_al-Fitr). It’s the holiday that ends the month of Ramadan. Some of the general rituals involved are:

– Donating to charity
– Showing happiness
– Walking to a Mosque
– Engaging in Prayer Services
– Enjoying fine food/festive meals

Specifically, in the US (quoting from the Wikipedia link above):

Most Muslims in the United States offer the Eid prayer in big-city Islamic centers, convention halls or open parks. Muslims from different cultures with multi-national customs get together for prayers and celebrations. In some cities, prayers are done at multiple times to accommodate the large number of attendees. Generally, Muslims visit each other’s homes on Eid or hold large feasts in mosques or community halls. Sometimes, mosques rent parks for Muslims to pray in.

During the 3 days of Eid, many Muslims join big parties sponsored either by a community mosque or Islamic center or by a wealthy Muslim in the community. Children receive gifts, and all participants enjoy sweet, spicy and other flavorful delicacies. Many Muslims also donate money to those less fortunate. Sometimes, Muslims reserve amusement parks, skating rinks or other activity centers for an entire day of fun.

Sounds like a wonderful holiday.

Starting in 2016, New York City public schools will be closed during Eid. This reminds me of various towns, cities, and states that were lobbied when I was young to close schools during Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, once their Jewish populations got big enough. I wonder if there were residents complaining about the special treatment that “those people” got when that happened, too…

As far as “being outnumbered”, let’s not go overboard here. According to recent estimates (http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2016/01/06/a-new-estimate-of-the-u-s-muslim-population/), there are about 3.3 million Muslims of all ages in the US. That represents only 1% of total US population. That number is expected to double by 2050 – in 34 YEARS. I hardly think we’re in danger of being “overrun” by Muslims in the US.

What’s more, most Muslims in the US (like most other immigrants) tend to integrate well into American society, as they aren’t marginalized and ostracized in the same way they often are in Europe (that’s not to say that they don’t face discrimination here; they certainly do, as evidenced by emails from 2008 that still get circulated to scare people).

In the case of this particular story, you’re talking about a group of Muslims who were refugees from Somalia, came to the US and settled in Tennessee, got jobs, joined the union, and ultimately petitioned their employer to allow them to have a day off to celebrate one of their holiest holidays. If that’s not how we want immigrants to behave in the US, I don’t know what is.

 

July 25, 2016

This is another in a series of responses to my conservative relative’s forwarded emails. If you’re interested, you can read more about how this all started.

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Received July 10, 2016 at 3:41 PM:

Lot of truth here…………………….

These three, short sentences tell you a lot about the direction of our current government and cultural environment:

1.) We are advised NOT to judge ALL Muslims by the actions of a few lunatics, but we are encouraged to judge ALL gun owners by the actions of a few lunatics.

Funny how that works. And here’s another one worth considering.

2.) Seems we constantly hear about how Social Security is going to run out of money. How come we never hear about welfare or food stamps running out of money? What’s interesting is the first group “worked for” their money, but the second didn’t.

Think about it….. Last but not least:

3.) Why are we cutting benefits for our veterans, no pay raises for our military and cutting our army to a level lower than before WWII, but we are not stopping payments to illegal aliens such as monthly payments for each child, money for housing, food stamps, free education including college and also the right to vote?

Am I the only one missing something?

 

My response:

I actually see very little truth here. See my responses inline below in green.

Love,

Begin forwarded message:

Lot of truth here…………………….

These three, short sentences tell you a lot about the direction of our current government and cultural environment:

1.)   We are advised NOT to judge ALL Muslims by the actions of a few lunatics, but we are encouraged to judge ALL gun owners by the actions of a few lunatics. 

These don’t strike me as the same at all. Few people say that all gun owners should be judged by the actions of the few people who do bad things with guns. Most people look at the appalling numbers of crimes that are committed with guns, and how easy it is to get guns in most states, and they talk about some sensible measures that should be put in place to make it harder to get guns or do as much damage with them (universal background checks, closing gun show and Internet loopholes, preventing suspected terrorists from getting guns, limiting the purchase of assault rifles, and limiting the sale of extended magazines). Similarly, as Islamic terrorism has increased, we’ve also put measures in place to try and limit the impact of terrorism here in the US: the US has upped the military intervention in countries that foster terrorism (Iraq, Afghanistan, Libya, Syria, etc.); we’ve increased screenings for refugees seeking asylum; we’ve increased the monitoring of communications and the flow of money to/from known terrorist groups; we monitor individuals inside the US and put people on terrorist watch lists, preventing them from having the same access to flights, etc.; the sale of materials that would be used to make bombs are more closely monitored; and, we increased security at airports and on planes.

Funny how that works. And here’s another one worth considering.

2.)   Seems we constantly hear about how Social Security is going to run out of money.     How come we never hear about welfare or food stamps running out of money?  What’s interesting is the first group “worked for” their money, but the second didn’t.  

We hear that Social Security is going to run out of money because of the large number of baby boomers that are/will soon be retiring and the fact that there are fewer current workers per retiree paying into social security than there used to be. However, even the fact that it’s going to “run out of money” isn’t true: https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/plum-line/wp/2016/03/11/stop-with-the-zombie-lies-no-social-security-is-not-going-broke/.

The reason that you don’t hear about food stamps or welfare running out of money is that they’re programs that cost far, far less (in 2014, Social Security paid out $714 billion, and SNAP paid out $74 billion – http://www.fns.usda.gov/sites/default/files/pd/SNAPsummary.pdf). Plus, the costs for SNAP are declining: http://www.cbpp.org/research/food-assistance/snap-costs-and-caseloads-declining. Add to that the fact that Republican legislators are constantly trying (and sometimes succeeding) in cutting welfare and food stamp programs (http://thinkprogress.org/economy/2015/03/17/3634319/food-stamps-attack-revisited/).

Think about it….. Last but not least:

3.)   Why are we cutting benefits for our veterans, no pay raises for our military and cutting our army to a level lower than before WWII, but we are not stopping payments to illegal aliens such as monthly payments for each child, money for housing, food stamps, free education including college and also the right to vote?  

Cutting of benefits to veterans is often something that’s done by Republicans in Congress (http://www.dailykos.com/story/2015/7/20/1404147/-Now-republicans-are-outraged-waving-the-Veterans-flag, http://addictinginfo.org/2016/02/23/gop-cut-funds-for-veterans-and-mental-health-and-now-we-have-a-veteran-suicide-epidemic/). Republicans aren’t the only ones doing this, but the hypocrisy of many Republicans/Conservatives saying that they’re pro-military and then not following through when it comes time to legislate pisses me off tremendously.

There have been military pay raises every year of Obama’s presidency: https://www.navycs.com/charts/ and http://www.govexec.com/pay-benefits/2014/09/one-chart-showing-every-military-pay-raise-last-30-years/94094/, so saying that there’s been “no pay raises for our military” is just a lie.

The military is smaller than in the past, but that’s also because we’re fighting different kinds of battles. We don’t need tons of foot soldiers to fight a ground war, when we have technology (e.g., drones and the like), and when the battles we’re fighting require smaller and more mobile units. As of 2014, we still have almost 1.4 million active military personnel (http://historyinpieces.com/research/us-military-personnel-1954-2014). Seems like plenty to me.

As far as benefits received by illegal immigrants, none of what’s stated above is true. Illegal immigrants are barred from receiving any federal benefits except for emergency medical care. Some states have granted illegal immigrants certain rights and benefits, but that’s a state-by-state choice. Some illegal immigrant family’s *children* receive benefits because they were born here and are therefore American citizens – just like you and me. They’re entitled to go to school and receive benefits (if they qualify for them). Moreover, let’s not pretend that illegal immigrants don’t contribute to the economy or pay taxes (http://www.usnews.com/news/articles/2016-03-01/study-undocumented-immigrants-pay-billions-in-taxes).

 

July 16, 2016

This is another in a series of responses to my conservative relative’s forwarded emails. If you’re interested, you can read more about how this all started.

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Received Jun 28, 2016 at 8:06 AM:

Subject New High School Principal Institutes Some Changes…

Listen to the young people, F-this, F-that, and nary anyone will step up and correct them- even with wife and kids in tow!

FINALLY – – Someone in the teaching profession had the courage to set the standards so badly needed NOW.

New high school principal

We watched high school principal Dennis Prager of Colorado, along with Sara Palin and Tom Brokaw on TV a couple of weeks ago…. What a dynamic, down to earth speaker. Even though Palin and Brokaw were also guest speakers they did little but nod and agree with him. This is the guy that should be running for President in 2016

A Speech Every American High School Principal Should Give.

By Dennis Prager.

To the students and faculty of our high school:

I am your new principal, and honored to be so. There is no greater calling than to teach young people.

I would like to apprise you of some important changes coming to our school. I am making these changes because I am convinced that most of the ideas that have dominated public education in America have worked against you, against your teachers and against our country.

First, this school will no longer honor race or ethnicity. I could not care less if your racial makeup is black, brown, red, yellow or white. I could not care less if your origins are African, Latin American, Asian or European, or if your ancestors arrived here on the Mayflower or on slave ships. The only identity I care about, the only one this school will recognize, is your individual identity — your character, your scholarship, your humanity. And the only national identity this school will care about is American.

This is an American public school, and American public schools were created to make better Americans. If you wish to affirm an ethnic, racial or religious identity through school, you will have to go elsewhere. We will end all ethnicity, race and non-American nationality-based celebrations. They undermine the motto of America, one of its three central values — E pluribus unum, “from many, one.” And this school will be guided by America’s values. This includes all after-school clubs. I will not authorize clubs that divide students based on any identities. This includes race, language, religion, sexual orientation or whatever else may become in vogue in a society divided by political correctness.

Your clubs will be based on interests and passions, not blood, ethnic, racial or other physically defined ties. Those clubs just cultivate narcissism — an unhealthy preoccupation with the self — while the purpose of education is to get you to think beyond yourself. So we will have clubs that transport you to the wonders and glories of art, music, astronomy, languages you do not already speak, carpentry and more. If the only extracurricular activities you can imagine being interested in are those based on ethnic, racial or sexual identity, that means that little outside of yourself really interests you.

Second, I am uninterested in whether English is your native language. My only interest in terms of language is that you leave this school speaking and writing English as fluently as possible. The English language has united America’s citizens for over 200 years, and it will unite us at this school. It is one of the indispensable reasons this country of immigrants has always come to be one country. And if you leave this school without excellent English language skills, I would be remiss in my duty to ensure that you will be prepared to successfully compete in the American job market. We will learn other languages here — it is deplorable that most Americans only speak English — but if you want classes taught in your native language rather than in English, this is not your school.

Third, because I regard learning as a sacred endeavor, everything in this school will reflect learning’s elevated status. This means, among other things, that you and your teachers will dress accordingly. Many people in our society dress more formally for Hollywood events than for church or school. These people have their priorities backward. Therefore, there will be a formal dress code at this school.

Fourth, no obscene language will be tolerated anywhere on this school’s property — whether in class, in the hallways or at athletic events. If you can’t speak without using the f -word, you can’t speak. By obscene language I mean the words banned by the Federal Communications Commission, plus epithets such as “Nigger,” even when used by one black student to address another black, or “bitch,” even when addressed by a girl to a girlfriend. It is my intent that by the time you leave this school, you will be among the few your age to instinctively distinguish between the elevated and the degraded, the holy and the obscene.

Fifth, we will end all self-esteem programs. In this school, self-esteem will be attained in only one way — the way people attained it until decided otherwise a generation ago — by earning it. One immediate consequence is that there will be one valedictorian, not eight.

Sixth, and last, I am reorienting the school toward academics and away from politics and propaganda. No more time will be devoted to scaring you about smoking and caffeine, or terrifying you about sexual harassment or global warming. No more semesters will be devoted to condom wearing and teaching you to regard sexual relations as only or primarily a health issue… There will be no more attempts to convince you that you are a victim because you are not white, or not male, or not heterosexual or not Christian. We will have failed if any one of you graduates this school and does not consider him or her inordinately fortunate — to be alive and to be an American.

Now, please stand and join me in the Pledge of Allegiance to the flag of our country. As many of you do not know the words, your teachers will hand them out to you..

Pass this along if you agree. . . . If not delete it!

 

My response:

Some points that I agree with in here, and many that I do not. As I kept reading though, I thought to myself: there’s no way a public school teacher gave this speech. And it turns out, that’s true.

http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/principal.asp

 

Her response:

I had a feeling it wasn’t really delivered by a principal. I don’t know any principals that have the guts and I worked for 8 different ones over the years. I liked what it had to say, so I thought I’d pass it on anyway and hope that perhaps there was someone out there that actually had the back bone to do it.
What didn’t you agree with ?????
This one seemed pretty harmless to me.
Love you!!!!!!!!!

 

My response:

As I sat down to say what I did and didn’t like about the “speech”, I ended up writing more than I expected to. My thoughts are below, in red. Enjoy!

A Speech Every American High School Principal Should Give.

By Dennis Prager.

To the students and faculty of our high school:

I am your new principal, and honored to be so. There is no greater calling than to teach young people.

I would like to apprise you of some important changes coming to our school. I am making these changes because I am convinced that most of the ideas that have dominated public education in America have worked against you, against your teachers and against our country.

This was the first place that my spidey senses started tingling. I find it hard to believe that someone who truly believes that education in America is systemically working against students, teachers, and our country as a whole would have risen to the level of principal of a school. I don’t deny that there are teachers who are frustrated (and have good reason to be) with their jobs, the administration, the legislators, and even the public and still remain teachers, but to become a high school principal and retain those attitudes seems strange. Most principals I’ve met or seen interviewed seem to have a fundamental belief in education and the system as a whole, even if it’s very flawed. That may just be me not knowing enough principals…

First, this school will no longer honor race or ethnicity. I could not care less if your racial makeup is black, brown, red, yellow or white. I could not care less if your origins are African, Latin American, Asian or European, or if your ancestors arrived here on the Mayflower or on slave ships. The only identity I care about, the only one this school will recognize, is your individual identity — your character, your scholarship, your humanity. And the only national identity this school will care about is American.

This strikes me as an incredibly white, privileged statement. Any time I hear someone say that they “don’t see color”, I can be pretty sure without looking at them that they’re white. There are tons of statistics out there that talk about how kids of color are treated differently in public schools than white kids (http://www.nytimes.com/2015/08/25/us/higher-expulsion-rates-for-black-students-are-found.html), even as young as kindergarten (http://www.theatlantic.com/education/archive/2015/12/why-are-so-many-preschoolers-getting-suspended/418932/). And while it’s admirable to try to push towards a world where color doesn’t matter, to say that we’re living in that world now ignores realities on the ground.

This is an American public school, and American public schools were created to make better Americans. If you wish to affirm an ethnic, racial or religious identity through school, you will have to go elsewhere. We will end all ethnicity, race and non-American nationality-based celebrations. They undermine the motto of America, one of its three central values — E pluribus unum, “from many, one.” And this school will be guided by America’s values. This includes all after-school clubs. I will not authorize clubs that divide students based on any identities. This includes race, language, religion, sexual orientation or whatever else may become in vogue in a society divided by political correctness.

Your clubs will be based on interests and passions, not blood, ethnic, racial or other physically defined ties. Those clubs just cultivate narcissism — an unhealthy preoccupation with the self — while the purpose of education is to get you to think beyond yourself. So we will have clubs that transport you to the wonders and glories of art, music, astronomy, languages you do not already speak, carpentry and more. If the only extracurricular activities you can imagine being interested in are those based on ethnic, racial or sexual identity, that means that little outside of yourself really interests you.

There’s a fine line on this one. I agree with the sentiment, and in general I think that clubs and programs that divide kids aren’t good. However, I know of no school club that is allowed to exclude based on ethnicity, race, or sexual identity. In public schools, the Catholic Club or Hillel or, yes, the Muslim Students Organization welcomes people of other faiths who are interested in learning more. And, in fact, since they’re a group at a public school, they’re not allowed to exclude.

I also find the inclusion of sexual identity in this list to be troublesome. Even today, with all of the advances for LGBT people in this country, high schools can still be incredibly dangerous places for queer kids. Gay Straight Alliances (GSAs) are the most common type of school clubs that form to create a place where these kids can feel like they’re not constantly being persecuted by their peers. LGBT teens are still 4 times more likely to attempt suicide than their straight peers (http://www.thetrevorproject.org/pages/facts-about-suicide).

Moreover, studies have shown that schools with GSAs benefit tremendously, with the rates of discrimination, sexual discrimination, and suicidal thoughts and attempts dropping for all students, gay and straight (http://www.salon.com/2014/01/24/high_schools_with_gay_straight_alliances_have_reduced_risk_for_suicide_parnter/ and http://www.tolerance.org/magazine/number-31-spring-2007/feature/why-we-need-gsa).

Second, I am uninterested in whether English is your native language. My only interest in terms of language is that you leave this school speaking and writing English as fluently as possible. The English language has united America’s citizens for over 200 years, and it will unite us at this school. It is one of the indispensable reasons this country of immigrants has always come to be one country. And if you leave this school without excellent English language skills, I would be remiss in my duty to ensure that you will be prepared to successfully compete in the American job market. We will learn other languages here — it is deplorable that most Americans only speak English — but if you want classes taught in your native language rather than in English, this is not your school.

By all means, let’s focus on teaching kids English and leaving high school speaking it “as fluently as possible.” And I do agree that the English language has united a country of immigrants. It’s one of the many reasons why the US has been more successful in integrating its immigrant populations than many countries in Europe.

I’ve never heard of public schools teaching classes (besides foreign language classes) completely in another language. I have heard of bilingual education, where classes are taught in English AND another language, in an effort to bridge the gap for kids who don’t speak English well. Those make sense to me, especially if you’ve made it to high school and still don’t speak English fluently.

There do appear to be some very considered arguments for why bilingual education isn’t a good idea, and why it’s even limiting to non-native English speakers. However, I don’t know what a better solution is, and I don’t understand how you’d teach a kid who doesn’t speak English otherwise.

Ultimately, the “if you want classes taught in your native language rather than in English” argument sounds very much like describing an epidemic that doesn’t exist.

Third, because I regard learning as a sacred endeavor, everything in this school will reflect learning’s elevated status. This means, among other things, that you and your teachers will dress accordingly. Many people in our society dress more formally for Hollywood events than for church or school. These people have their priorities backward. Therefore, there will be a formal dress code at this school.

I have big, big problems with this. There’s lots of interesting discussion about school uniforms and the good that they do in schools: equalizing rich and poor kids, eliminating the “fashion” aspect of dressing for school, and in some studies even finding that they make kids more comfortable and happy.

However, this fictional principal doesn’t say uniforms, he talks about a dress code, and dress codes, time after time, treat girls way more unfairly than boys.

Time after time, and article after article, I read about dress codes where there are very little limits on what boys can wear, but girls’ wardrobes are highly proscripted, and it’s the start of rape culture and girls/women being told that they have to cover themselves up so as not to “rile up” the boys/men (http://time.com/3892965/everydaysexism-school-dress-codes-rape-culture/ and http://www.theatlantic.com/education/archive/2015/10/school-dress-codes-are-problematic/410962/).

Moreover, if you believe in the rights of Trans people (which I do), then school dress codes are often tremendously problematic for that group, because they don’t allow Trans kids to dress according to their gender expression (http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/08/fashion/08cross.html).

Fourth, no obscene language will be tolerated anywhere on this school’s property — whether in class, in the hallways or at athletic events. If you can’t speak without using the f -word, you can’t speak. By obscene language I mean the words banned by the Federal Communications Commission, plus epithets such as “Nigger,” even when used by one black student to address another black, or “bitch,” even when addressed by a girl to a girlfriend. It is my intent that by the time you leave this school, you will be among the few your age to instinctively distinguish between the elevated and the degraded, the holy and the obscene.

This was the paragraph where I was sure that it wasn’t a real speech given by a principal. There’s no way any public school principal, no matter what his/her race, would use the N-word in a speech.

That aside, I have mixed feelings about this paragraph. I do think that a certain amount of decorum in classes is appropriate, and I don’t think that it’d be inappropriate for a teacher to insist that students not curse in their classes, in the same way that I used to have teachers insist that kids took their hats off in class.

This paragraph, though, also talks about “in the hallways or at athletic events”. Now you’re starting to get into policing kids’ speech in semi-public or public places, and I find that troubling. I don’t like any time any organization of power does that.

In addition, words have context. They’re not always bad. Even the FCC guidelines referenced in this paragraph (https://www.fcc.gov/consumers/guides/obscene-indecent-and-profane-broadcasts) speak to the fact that obscenity is based on context. (By the way, if you’ve never listened to George Carlin’s “7 Words You Can’t Say on Television” bit from the 70’s, you should: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dCIKqkIg1w).

Fifth, we will end all self-esteem programs. In this school, self-esteem will be attained in only one way — the way people attained it until decided otherwise a generation ago — by earning it. One immediate consequence is that there will be one valedictorian, not eight.

This feels like another stated epidemic in search of an actual, real problem. I’m not aware of a huge trend in schools across the country having eight valedictorians.

Sixth, and last, I am reorienting the school toward academics and away from politics and propaganda. No more time will be devoted to scaring you about smoking and caffeine, or terrifying you about sexual harassment or global warming. No more semesters will be devoted to condom wearing and teaching you to regard sexual relations as only or primarily a health issue… There will be no more attempts to convince you that you are a victim because you are not white, or not male, or not heterosexual or not Christian. We will have failed if any one of you graduates this school and does not consider him or her inordinately fortunate — to be alive and to be an American.

Schools have a major role in talking to and educating kids about social issues. Anti-smoking information in schools helps prevent kids from becoming smokers (https://www.tobaccofreekids.org/research/factsheets/pdf/0153.pdf). Sexual harassment and consent are real things that kids need to be taught about as early as possible if we want a safe society for girls and women (see Brock Turner’s recent trial and sentencing). Global warming is a real issue, especially for the youth of this world, and teaching kids about its effects might inspire some of them to develop a key piece of technology that could help solve the problem. Condom distribution programs have been proven to increase condom use, prevent HIV and other STIs, and save money – all without increasing the rates of sexual activity amongst teenagers (http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/programresources/guidance/condoms/ and https://www.guttmacher.org/about/journals/psrh/1998/03/impact-high-school-condom-availability-program-sexual-attitudes-and).

I do agree that sexual relations shouldn’t only or primarily be treated as a health issue. We should have comprehensive sex ed in schools that teaches kids about biology, but also about consent and about sexual agency. There are recent studies that show that many teenage girls don’t even know that sex is supposed to feel good (http://qz.com/674336/the-revolutionary-idea-that-sex-should-feel-good-for-teen-girls-too/), and as such sex becomes a strange and sometimes dangerous proposition for them.

That said, I guarantee you that the author of this passage wouldn’t agree with me on how sex ed should be handled in school. I’m virtually certain that he’d advocate for biology-only sex ed, or even absitence only education.

The last sentences, about being a victim because you are “not white, or not male, or not heterosexual, or not Christian” is another one that smacks of straight, white, male privilege. Non-white people, women, LGBT people, and (to a lesser extent) non-Christians, face a different reality in this country than straight white men do (I say this knowingly as a straight white man). Women are paid less than men for doing the same jobs. Despite the recent advances for LGBT people, they can still be fired from their jobs for no other reason than their sexual orientation. People of color continue to face overwhelming discrimination, and racism is still very real and very present. To not acknowledge these truths as part of educating students is to not prepare them for the world, and raise them in a bubble that ignores reality.

Now, please stand and join me in the Pledge of Allegiance to the flag of our country. As many of you do not know the words, your teachers will hand them out to you..

This is another place where I knew this wasn’t a real high school principal. Students are allowed, by law, to abstain from saying the Pledge of Allegiance. It’s been upheld by the Supreme Court (http://aclu-or.org/blog/students-not-required-participate-pledge-allegiance).

 

Her response:

Wow!!!!! I gave you quite a homework assignment! Sorry, but thanks for the input!

 

July 16, 2016

Back in February, I was visiting with one of my relatives, and we were talking about politics. I knew from previous conversations that she was much more conservative than I am (while I’m not a registered Democrat, I’m pretty left leaning politically), especially when it came to immigration. We talked a bit about Trump and Bernie, and not much about Hillary, since she can’t talk about Hillary without her face getting all red. She pulled out her laptop and showed me a couple of videos which I strongly disagreed with. We debated back and forth a bit.

The conversation ended with her telling me that she often wanted to include me on the things she forwarded via email to other friends and family, but didn’t because she thought I’d be upset with her. I told her to go ahead and add me to her list. I’d be interested to see what she sent, and while I probably wouldn’t agree with it most of the time, it wouldn’t make me angry with her or love her less.

A couple of weeks later I got my first email. It was sent to 47 people. My first reaction was, “I don’t think there’s any email I could write that I’d send to 47 people.” My second reaction, after reading just the subject line was, “this can’t possibly be true.” I checked. It wasn’t.

I get at least one email a week from her, sometimes more. Many of them I read, shake my head at, and ignore. Some I take the time to Google or check on Snopes, and send her back the link showing why it’s not true. And once in a while, I get a message from her that I just feel the need to explain in detail why it’s factually wrong and/or why I disagree with it.

I wanted to share some of that last group with you. They’ll be here, collected under the ConservativeDebunking tag.

 

January 25, 2016

This past weekend, I went to the hospital for a follow up MRI. The procedure itself was uneventful, though going to the hospital on a Saturday afternoon is eerie. No one’s in the elevators or the waiting rooms, and it’s incredibly, even strangely, calm and quiet. It’s not the first time I’ve noticed it, but for some reason I was struck by it this time, more than usual.

This morning, I got a call from a nurse. She apologized for bothering me and assured me her call wasn’t about my health or recent test. I thought at first that it might be a fundraising call.

She told me that there was an “exposure issue” during my MRI. Apparently, when my IV was removed, there was some blood spatter that had gone into someone’s eye. No one reacted at the time, so I’m not sure if it was during the removal or afterwards as things were being moved around and disposed of. However, I was being called to find out if I’d be willing to come into the hospital and have some blood drawn so they could test me for HIV and Hepatitis. While I know that I don’t have these, they obviously can’t just take my word for it.

I immediately said yes. I can’t imagine the stress that that sort of incident causes a health care worker, and while it’s a minor inconvenience for me, if it helps settle another person’s fears (and means that they don’t have to take a bunch of meds for several weeks), then I’m happy to do it.

The nurse was really enthusiastic with her thanks, and it sounded like she sometimes has to make these calls and hears people say no. Which made me think, do people really say no when this question comes up? Besides people who might not be able to go back to the hospital and miss more work, find more childcare, etc., do people really refuse this request?

I’m off to the hospital in the morning. I figure I’ve had enough needles stuck in my arms and enough blood drawn… what’s one more time?

December 10, 2015

Cancer and uncertainty are a bad combination.

I had my surgery in the summer of 2012. That means that every summer for my “anniversary” I have a CT as part of my annual follow up. So far, that hasn’t meant much more than once a year I have one extra drive to the hospital and some less-than-appetizing stuff to drink prior to a quick scan. The scans have come back normal, and life has continued.

This year, things went a little differently.

In July, I had my CT scan as usual, and a couple of weeks later I had my appointment with my oncologist. My bloodwork all looked normal, but the radiologist who’d reviewed my CT had noticed something that looked off with my liver.

Talking through it with my oncologist, they agreed that the problem area on the scan was probably an area of regeneration: my liver continuing to recover from the effects of the oxaliplatin. However, they wanted to have me get an MRI in three months. The MRI would allow things to be viewed with higher clarity, and the time would allow for comparison against current size.

Enter the first round of waiting and wondering. You try really hard to let the “it’s probably nothing” angel on your shoulder win out over the “what if it is something” devil whispering in your other ear. I’ll confess that I’ve largely been able to keep a positive, non-worrying attitude as time’s passed, but there are moments of mild unease.

So, along comes November and I get an MRI. At my oncologist’s office the following week, I’m informed that more areas on my liver “lit up” with the MRI. The hypothesis is still that these are areas of regeneration and healing, but given my history, a biopsy to be sure is probably the best course of action. Another appointment is made, and I’m scheduled for a liver biopsy in early December.

They first do an ultrasound to make sure that they can see what they need to biopsy. This time around, they couldn’t. The spots were too small and too inconveniently positioned for them to be able to be sure they were biopsying the right spot. So I was sent home without having a need puncture my side.

Now we’re down to fewer options. They could go in surgically, look around, and take a biopsy, but given my history and what this likely is, that seems like overkill. So, after speaking with my oncologist again, we agree to do another MRI in January to see whether or not the spots have changed at all. If they haven’t, then it’s a good indication that indeed, these are areas of regeneration and there’s truly nothing to worry about.

This isn’t a huge deal. However, consider the fact that I went for my annual follow up in July. It’s now almost January and I still don’t have a solid, clear answer of what’s going on. Not that I want it to be serious, but at least when I needed surgery, there was conclusive evidence to go on.

August 28, 2014

This is one of several posts that I began writing while the events were occurring, but never posted. They’ve been on my mind lately, so I’ve gone back and finished them.

I don’t know if it’s this way for everyone who’s been through a serious illness, but once I stopped dealing with treatment and recovery day to day, it started to fade into the past pretty quickly.

This came to mind yesterday at an appointment with my oncologist. While I’ve been seeing her every three months, this was my big annual appointment. I’d had a CT scan a couple of weeks ago and we were meeting to talk through my status.

In talking through my CT and blood work, there was a question that arose about how long it had been since my surgery (it’s been two years), and I could not remember. I had one of those moments where I stammered “I think 3 years…? No, wait… maybe two…?”

She looked at the computer (the exact timing had slipped her mind, too), and we were set straight. But, it was pleasantly odd to think that this thing that had consumed so much of my life for over a year was starting to fade a little.

September 18, 2013

This is one of several posts that I began writing while the events were occurring, but never posted. They’ve been on my mind lately, so I’ve gone back and finished them.

 

For the record, that’s the second Silence of the Lambs reference in the last year…

I had my one year follow up tests back in July: a colonoscopy and a CT scan. And, at the very end of July, I had an appointment to review all of the results with my oncologist. I had more blood drawn the morning of the appointment, but we talked through everything else.

The good news was that my CT scan was clear (my spleen was slightly enlarged, but not dangerously so, and that’s somewhat to be expected since chemo drugs can affect the liver slightly, which makes the spleen work harder) and my colonoscopy was clear. My oncologist gave me a “clean” bill of health (as much as you can have after finishing chemotherapy) and confirmed that I can start coming in every three months for monitoring. And, I could get my port out. All good things.

Then my phone rang the next morning and things got a little more complicated.

It was my oncologist, telling me that there were a few things about my blood work that she wanted to go over with me. You see, any time I go in and meet with her, they draw some blood and do a basic work up, but not all of the results always come back before I leave the office. The previous day, most of them were done in time for our meeting, but a few were still yet to come.

The good news was that my CEA level (the test that’s supposed to be a marker for colon cancer) was a 1.0 (normal is less than 5), so that was a good result. I was still somewhat anemic, and my white counts and platelets were a little low, but none of that was concerning, and they were trending up – just not in the normal range quite yet. Interestingly, my iron counts were very low, and I was told to start taking an iron supplement – an easy adjustment.

Based on some of the test results, they’d run some additional tests for liver function, and those were far off from where they should be. My oncologist said that it was likely that it was related to the chemo, but since it was now almost August and I’d finished chemo in mid-February, she couldn’t comfortably/definitively say that that was the cause. As a result, she wanted me to go see one of the liver specialists (a hepatologist) to have him do a workup/diagnosis.

Appointments were made, and off I went to yet another doctor.

What followed was a series of appointments and tests, all to hopefully prove that everything was fine. There’s a stange cognitive dissonance that happens in this situation. Over the course of weeks, my mind had some combination of the following thoughts:

• Am I going to get sick again?
• No, they said that it was probably nothing.
• Great… now I need to have another appointment/test/thing.
• I guess I need to take another day off of work (as does my wife since I’m not allowed to drive after that test).
• What if I get sick again…?
• This is such a pain in the ass… since it’s probably nothing.

I went to my first appointment with the hepatologist, which felt like a waste of time. As a patient, initial consultations feel like they’re only necessary because the doctors don’t talk to each other. I went there so that he could review the case with me and tell me what tests needed to happen. Great. Thanks. We couldn’t have done this over the phone…?

Ultimately, he said that I probably had Nodular Regenerative Hyperplasia (http://www.livertox.nih.gov/Phenotypes_nodular.html) caused by the Oxaliplatin. It’s not a super-common side effect of the drug, but it was one that he’d seen often enough that he wasn’t surprised by the correlation. However, just to be safe and to rule out anything worse, he wanted me to get a liver ultrasound, a liver biopsy, a fibroscan, and an endoscopy.

I had the ultrasound and biopsy first, about a week later. For something that only takes a few minutes, it takes the whole day. I showed up at the hospital in the morning, checked in, and waited. After getting changed, I first got brought into an ultrasound room. For a few minutes, I got to experience what pregnant women experience all the time: some gel got squirted on my side, and an ultrasound probe was rubbed around. They took some pictures, and then I laid down on the gurney and waited again.

Eventually, I was brought into a small procedure room. They use an ultrasound again to guide where the biopsy is being taken from. So, more gel, more probe against the side. I was given some drugs which made me very sleepy, but did remain awake. That was a little weird, since there’s someone taking a large, long needle and puncturing you in the side with it. However, it wasn’t that painful in the moment. The procedure itself took less than half an hour.

They make you wait about three hours after the procedure in recovery, to make sure that the drugs are wearing off and that there’s no internal bleeding, and then I was sent home. I was a little sore the next day, but that was about it.

I did the Fibroscan a week later. It was fast and easy, but required yet another visit to the hepatologist’s office – the machine is just sort of shoved in the corner. I didn’t have to get undressed. I just had to pull up my shirt and they held a probe against my side, very much like an ultrasound. The main difference is that when the probe touches you, it feels like someone’s tapping or thumping on your side. But it’s not painful or invasive in any way.

A couple of weeks after that I had the endoscopy. Process-wise, it’s a lot like a colonoscopy, except the probe is going down your throat. And as a patient, it’s a very similar experience: go in, change into a johnny, get an IV put in, and then some drugs get pumped in that make you go to sleep and forget everything, and then wake up in recovery.

After going through all of these tests, it was confirmed that indeed, I’ve got NRH. The treatment? Stop taking oxaliplatin. Since my chemo ended six months ago, that’s not a problem.

The good news is that the liver tends to heal over time, so this should go away. I need to keep having my liver levels tested every three months to make sure that they’re trending up, and as long as they do, there’s no need for further regular tests.

However, I also need to have a follow up endoscopy in a year. They did find one varix (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Esophageal_varices) that they want to monitor and make sure it doesn’t get any worse.

While I’m glad that everything’s “fine”, the process of proving that everything is fine was wearing and sometimes felt overly complicated. “It’s probably nothing” is meant, I think, to be comforting, but the unknown is stressful even if the odds are good.